Awakened early by a snuggly bug, an almost 5-year-old snuggly bug. Five!? After an hour of snuggles, our 6-year-old beauty joins us and we putter downstairs to my brother and sister-in-law's cozy kitchen. Coffee is made for me. Children color at the table with a much-loved cousin. Husband snoozes upstairs. Life feels a bit like a retreat right now. This is a nice start, 2013. Well done.
Last night, as I contemplated goals, resolutions, plans for the new year, I found myself a little...uninspired. There are certainly parts of my life that need tinkering. Certainly habits that could use some breaking.
However, my instinctive reaction to life is to be action-oriented. Challenging day with the kids? Read up on ideas once they go to bed, talk to trusted friends, and make a plan for tomorrow. Feeling a little off? Make a good lunch and go for a long walk the next day. I found myself wondering if my list of goals will just put more pressure on myself, when I already do that pretty damn well all on my own.
Still, I do want to get back to yoga, to learn to sew, to practice Spanish, to wash my face at night (sort of a lame resolution, but my flossing one last year was just as lame and was a game-changer.) :)
I read about a woman who comes up with a theme each year on which to focus. I appreciate the singular focus of a theme, the vagueness that allows interpretation as we, inevitably, change over the next 12 months. My theme...Growth.
I am emerging out of the phase of my life where I am knee-deep in caring for young children. This fact can make me weep if I think about it too long. However, it is an important transition back to myself.